"We Are Family" Episode: 212

(Episode opens with Valenti in the Sheriff's office giving a statement to the Judge about finding Laurie in the woods. Max and Liz are in the lobby with Deputy Hanson doing the same.)

ISABEL: Ahem.

HANSON: About what time did you arrive at the scene?

MAX: 9:30.

SHERIFF: Shortly after 10 p.m.

DAN: How exactly did you locate that girl?

SHERIFF: I, uh...I spotted the oxygen tanks.

ISABEL: We heard her screaming.

DAN: How many shots were fired?

SHERIFF: 4...from the north.

MAX: 6?

DAN: What were you kids doing in those woods?

MAX: We were, um...uh, hiking.

SHERIFF: The Evans kids were on their way back from the library when their car broke down. I was, uh...I was giving them a lift when the call came in.

JUDGE: Jim, didn't you say you got to the scene after 10:00? I may be wrong, but I think our library closes at 8:00. HANSON: Okay, that's it for now. Your parents have been notified, and they're expecting you at home. Deputy Carter will take you.

MAX: Can we see the Sheriff?

HANSON: Sorry, kids. Not right now.

[Valenti and Lubetkin shouting]

SHERIFF: Oh, this whole thing is a load of crap.

DAN: Your abuse of procedure shows a complete...

SHERIFF: Wait one damn second! Police work saved that woman's life tonight.

JUDGE: Mr. Lubetkin...

JUDGE (to Sheriff): Have your report on my desk by 10 a.m. tomorrow morning. Jim...policy dictates that...umm...we set a hearing of the city council to discuss this.

SHERIFF: Well, whatever policy dictates.

JUDGE: You're burnt out. You need a break. Give me your badge and your gun. You're officially suspended until this week's hearing.

(At the hospital where Laurie was taken)

NURSE: There she is. Did you have a good rest?

LAURIE: You...saved my life?

NURSE: No, the people who found you did. There are some...uh...folks from the Sheriff's department who'd like to talk to you when you're feeling up to it. I can tell them to wait. Can I get you anything, sweetie?

LAURIE: Juice.

P.A.: Dr. Kravitz, you have a visitor in the main lobby.

TESS: The sexual dysfunction unit's that way.

MICHAEL: Funny.

TESS: Ok, according to the bloodwork and X-rays, Laurie is human.

MICHAEL: That's impossible. Why did Isabel have a flash when she touched her?

TESS: I don't know. We got the info Max wanted. Let's just get out of here. This polyester number is not working for me.

MICHAEL: Not until I get a look at her.

TESS: Don't even think about it. Michael! Michael!

(Opening credits)

(The next morning at the Valenti home. Someone is knocking persistently on the door)

DUFF: Sheriff Valenti?

SHERIFF: Yeah?

DUFF: Agent Suzanne Duff, FBI. Good. You're showered.

SHERIFF: Can I help you?

DUFF: Yeah, I think so. Laurie Dupree is missing again.

SHERIFF: Yeah, I'm aware of that.

DUFF: And in the interest of locating her and catching her attacker, Judge Lewis has agreed to let me bring you back in on the case. You got any more half and half?

SHERIFF: Uh, no.

DUFF: Here are the conditions. You're still suspended, so I call the shots. You follow my lead, and you get my back when I need it.

SHERIFF: My lucky day.

DUFF: Well, hey...it beats watching Oprah.

SHERIFF: Listen, Agent Duff...I've got a whole bullpen full of deputies down there who would love to be your gopher.

DUFF: You know what, I appreciate honesty. So, I'm gonna be straight. This is my second case. My first was an interstate kidnapping that went off without a hitch. I like to catch criminals, and I want to make assistant director by the time I'm 35. That means busting my butt and asking for help when I need it. So?

SHERIFF: That's honesty.

DUFF: And here's some more. You make a horrendous cup of coffee.

SHERIFF: Yeah? Wait'll you taste what we make down at the station. Come on. We got a girl to find.

(At school, Alex surprises Maria)

ALEX: "Javlar, jag missade bussen."

MARIA: Oh, my God! Alex! Oh, my God! I missed you so much! How was your trip home?

ALEX: Oh, well, the flight from Stockholm was, like, 10 hours late. Yeah, "vilken javla rora". Oh. "What a bloody mess".

(Liz walks over to greet Alex)

LIZ: Oh, Alex, hey!

ALEX: Hi!

LIZ: We...oh, uh..."hur ar det"? I looked up Swedish web sites while you were gone.

ALEX: Well, then, in that case "tack bra".

LIZ: Thank you. Oh, did you see the midnight sun?

MARIA: Ok, stop hogging him, Frieda. So, were the Viking guys hot, huh?

ALEX: Well, you can decide that after you see my slides.

LIZ: Ooh! I'm so excited!

ALEX: So, how is everybody here?

LIZ: Umm...uh, Sheriff Valenti...he was suspended last night. It was in this morning's paper. Well, what...

MARIA: Did they find that girl, by the way, who escaped from the hospital?

LIZ: Umm, no, and people are saying that, you know, whoever kidnapped her may have come back.

(Maria spies Max off to the side)

MARIA: Oh, um, ahem. Look. Max. He needs you.

LIZ: Ok. Umm, Alex, it's so good to see you. I'll see you guys later.

ALEX: I've been gone one month.

MARIA: Let's hit the vending machines. I'll catch you up.

LIZ: Max, are you okay? I read about what happened. How's Isabel?

MAX: We're fine. It's Valenti I'm worried about. I can't even get him on the phone.

LIZ: I'm sorry. This is really awful.

MAX: Kyle...

(Kyle avoids Max and walks away)

(Kyle shows up at his dad's office and drops a bag on his desk)

KYLE: Chicken sandwich, extra mayo. So...were you gonna talk to me about the front page of the newspaper...

SHERIFF: Kyle, of course I was gonna talk to you about it. I will talk to you about it. Umm...I've just been brought back here as kind of glorified secretary, so my time isn't really my own.

KYLE: Some pal Judge Lewis turned out to be.

SHERIFF: He doesn't know what we know.

KYLE: I know, but it pisses me off that we can't tell him the truth.

SHERIFF: Well, as you kids say, it sucks big.

DUFF: Sheriff, where the hell is that background report I asked you for?

SHERIFF: Agent Duff, this is my son Kyle. Kyle, Agent Duff from the FBI.

DUFF: Hi. Nice to meet you. You look just like your father.

KYLE: Thank you. Well, I, uh, I gotta go. I'm late for class.

DUFF: Right. It's nice to meet you.

(Kyle leaves)

SHERIFF: Yeah, can I see those?

DUFF: Mmm-hmm. We've got a pretty decent shoe print at the burial site and synthetic fibers pulled from the duct tape that bound the girl. And what's the update on Laurie Dupree?

SHERIFF: My guys are sifting through the prints from her hospital room right now. Her last address was the Pinecrest Psychiatric Hospital, Brownsfield, Texas. Paranoid schizophrenic. No parents or guardians on record. And she ran away from there one week before the kidnapping. Her doctors are faxing her records.

DUFF: CC those to me.

SHERIFF: Right.

(Sheriff Valenti gets paged by Michael. He meets Michael at the burial site)

MICHAEL: This wasn't here last night.

SHERIFF: So, why the hell are you poking around a closed crime scene?

MICHAEL: If I don't look after us, who will?

SHERIFF: Anyone see you?

MICHAEL: No.

SHERIFF: Are you sure? Listen, Michael, you can't be doing this anymore. The FBI is involved. This is how trouble starts. You got it?

MICHAEL: Yeah.

SHERIFF: If I need anything, I'll call you.

(At the Crashdown, Liz is clearing off the table that Max was sitting at)

MAX: Uh, I wasn't done.

LIZ: Oh. Ok. It's late.

MAX: Did you study for history?

LIZ: Uh, yeah. I was going to once my shift ended.

MAX: Can I have another Coke?

LIZ: Max, you've been sitting here since 6:00.

MAX: I don't wanna go home. There's someone dangerous in our town, Liz. Someone who'd do that to a defenseless person.

LIZ: That's why you're here. You're worried about me. Thank you.

(Sean knocks on the front door of the Crashdown)

LIZ: One second.

SEAN: I would kill for some Chili Orbit Rings.

LIZ: I'm sorry, Sean, but the kitchen's closed.

SEAN: Come on. Ok, ok...umm, Asteroid Pie.

LIZ: Uh, the last piece went at 6:00.

SEAN: Why do you gotta be so cruel, Parker?

LIZ: Just come back tomorrow, Sean, okay? I'll give you 10% off.

SEAN: 20.

LIZ: Good night, Sean.

(Sean leaves and Liz goes back over to Max)

LIZ: Ok, um, you know what...my books are upstairs, and there are 2 pieces of Asteroid Pie left in the fridge. You can stay as long as you like.

(Sheriff Valenti arrives at home and opens the closet to hang up his coat. Laurie Dupree is hiding there)

LAURIE: Aah! Stop looking for me! Please!

(Switch to the outside of Liz's room, where Alex is setting up the slide projector to show Liz, Maria, and Isabel slides of his trip)

ISABEL: I can't stop thinking about her.

LIZ: Well, I'm glad you came.

ISABEL: So am I. Thanks, I really needed this.

MARIA: Ok, an appetizer of swedish fish. These are lundstrom bowls from IKEA. And a smorgasbord will follow if it doesn't freeze.

ALEX: Yeah, you know what? You guys are sissies, 'cause after a winter in Sweden, this weather is downright balmy.

ISABEL: That's a lot of slide carousels, Alex.

ALEX: Yeah, well, you know, I wanted you guys to feel like you had been there, too.

(Switch back to Laurie and Sheriff Valenti)

SHERIFF: Laurie, you need to see a doctor.

LAURIE: No, no, no. Th-they get into hospitals.

SHERIFF: Don't be afraid. A lot of people want to help you.

LAURIE: No, no! No one can know I'm here, just you. Y-you found me. If you were working for them, you wouldn't have saved me. Can I trust you?

SHERIFF: Yes. You can trust me. Come on. Now, are you talking about the person that did this to you? Was there more than one?

LAURIE: Everyone keeps asking me about the man who took me. Is he tall or short or fat or thin? But it wasn't a man. It was a them. They're not from here.

(Agent Duff calls Sheriff Valenti on the phone)

SHERIFF: Yeah?

DUFF: I just found out that there's been a construction crew working on that whole stretch of highway leading into Frazier Woods. The entire gang's on their way in for interviews so I'm gonna need your help.

SHERIFF: This can't wait till tomorrow?

DUFF: Not when I'm calling the shots. I thought we had an agreement, Sheriff. Can I count on you or not?

SHERIFF: Yeah, I'll be right there.

LAURIE: Y-you're leaving?

SHERIFF: Not just yet. Listen, if you can trust me, then you can trust the people that I say are okay, right?

(Switch back to Liz's place. Sheriff Valenti calls and Liz answers)

LIZ: Oh, I'll get it, I'll get it. Uh, hello. Oh, yeah, hi, Sheriff. Um, yeah, of course. Hold on one second. Isabel, it's for you.

ISABEL: Hello? Aw, man. Yeah, okay, I'll be right there.

LIZ: Isabel, is everything okay?

ISABEL: Yeah, um, sure. Valenti just needs me to do something for him. I am so sorry, Alex.

ALEX: Don't worry about it.

ISABEL: Maybe we can do this some other time.

ALEX: Yeah, yeah, just let me know when it's good for you.

ISABEL: Well, I think your trip really agreed with you. You look great.

ALEX: Thanks. Yeah, I feel great. See you around.

ISABEL: Yeah, see you guys later.

LIZ & MARIA: Bye.

(Isabel leaves)

ALEX: Hey, Liz, do you have an extension cord?

LIZ: Oh, yeah, I do. I'll go get it.

(Liz walks down the stairs and notices Sean munching away on some food)

LIZ: Excuse me, what are you doing here?

SEAN: I was hungry. The...uh...auto show's in town this weekend.

LIZ: Uh-huh?

SEAN: I was gonna go.

LIZ: Where is that extension cord?

(Liz rummages around looking for the cord. Sean sees it and offers it to her)

SEAN: So, uh, you wanna go?

LIZ: Umm, I don't know. Cars are, you know, I just...maybe I will check it out.

SEAN: With me?

LIZ: Oh.

(Alex comes down the stairs looking for Liz)

ALEX: Hey...uh, Liz, do you have some Windex or something? The lens is dirty. Sean.

SEAN: Alice.

ALEX: Hey, that's funny. I haven't heard that since they put you away.

LIZ: In the kitchen?

ALEX: Thanks.

LIZ: Yeah, um, you know, thank you very much for the invitation, but I don't think I can go.

SEAN: The, uh...the guy who was in there with you before?

LIZ: Max. Well, yeah...it's just that we're, um, we're, you know...we're semi-involved, and it's not that it's romantic right now, but it has been in the past, and I just don't know about the future. We're friends. You know, we're friends plus.

SEAN: No sweat. Thanks for dinner.

ALEX: Hey, Parker, let's go.

(Switch to the grocery store. Kyle and Tess are shopping and they overhear some old ladies badmouthing Sheriff Valenti)

KYLE: Grab me some Skittles.

TESS: Hmm?

KYLE: No, you're not dumping this stuff on the candy.

TESS: Yes, I am.

WOMAN ONE: 2 minors in the Sheriff's patrol car, and I heard one missed taking a bullet by inches. It's crazy behavior, plain and simple.

WOMAN TWO: Well, his dad was a loon, and that type of thing's hereditary. And am I the only one wondering why he's escorting children through a deserted wood in the middle of the night?

WOMAN ONE: Well, have you seen the Evans girl? Looks like a supermodel..."trouble" written all over her.

AMY: Well, Nancy Anne, you'd be the expert on statutory rape. I mean, you must have done a ton of research when you found out your husband was sleeping with the baby-sitter, right? Oh, well, one thing you obviously know nothing about is Jim Valenti. Otherwise, you wouldn't be talking such trash. This and 2 scratch-off lottery tickets, please.

(Back at Valenti's place, Isabel is watching over Laurie)

ISABEL: Laurie, stop. Your hands are bleeding.

LAURIE: No, no, I have to get them out. They put them under there. That's what they do to me.

ISABEL: What do they do?

LAURIE: I'm so cold. I'm so cold.

ISABEL: Laurie...what did they do to you? LAURIE: Put needles in me. Put stuff inside. See?

ISABEL: I don't see anything.

LAURIE: I-It's there. I'm not crazy. They put me in a mental hospital, but I didn't belong there.

(Someone knocks on the front door)

ISABEL: Laurie, go into the bedroom, oK? Until I tell you it's all right.

(Isabel opens the door. Max and Michael come inside)

MAX: We got a message from Valenti. What's going on?

ISABEL: Laurie Dupree is here.

(They walk over to the bedroom door and Isabel knocks)

ISABEL: Laurie? Laurie, you can come out. It's ok. You remember Max. He was there that night. This is our friend Michael.

MICHAEL: Hey.

(Laurie looks as if she's seen a ghost. She becomes hysterical)

LAURIE: Ohh! You stay away from me! You're dead! You're dead!

(Laurie shuts the door and locks it)

ISABEL: No, Laurie! Laurie! Laurie! Laurie! Damn it!

(Laurie climbs out the window and starts running around outside)

LAURIE: Help, help! Help me! Help! Help! Hey, hey! Help, help! Somebody! Somebody, help me!

(At the Sheriff station)

SHERIFF: Listen, unless there's anything else...

DUFF: Oh, no. No, I'm just gonna finish up some paperwork, so, I'll see you tomorrow.

SHERIFF: Right.

(Isabel calls Sheriff Valenti's cell phone)

SHERIFF: Yeah?

ISABEL: Sheriff, she just took off! She just ran. Max and Michael are trying to catch her.

SHERIFF: I'm on my way.

(The phone rings and Agent Duff answers)

DUFF: Sheriff's department. What? Where?

(Laurie is running around erratically, screaming as she runs. Suddenly, Michael steps out and grabs her as she runs into him)

MICHAEL: Hey, don't worry. I'm not gonna hurt you.

LAURIE: No!

MICHAEL: Settle down!

[brakes squealing]

DRIVER: Are you all right?

LAURIE: Help me. Help me! The aliens are coming. Help me, they're coming! The aliens are coming.

(The police cars arrive on the scene)

LAURIE: Oh, no.

SHERIFF: Step back.

LAURIE: At his house! The aliens came to his house! The aliens are at his house. He held me there so they can come get me.

SHERIFF: People, walk away now. Let's go.

LAURIE: He said I'd be safe, that I could trust him.

SHERIFF: She doesn't know what she's talking about.

LAURIE: He told me he'd protect me. I was hiding in his house. 14 Olive Street. Brown couch...brown couch, green curtains, green checkered...checkered wallpaper. The aliens are his friends.

DUFF: Is this true? Was she there? Is this true?

(Sheriff Valenti doesn't answer)

DUFF: Our arrangement is over, Sheriff.

(Later, at the Sheriff station, Duff fires some questions at Sheriff Valenti)

DUFF: How'd you find her?

SHERIFF: I didn't. She came to me.

DUFF: And in that moment, a bell didn't go off in your head to call...I don't know, the police? Or here's a thought...me.

(Agent Duff places a recorder on the table and turns it on)

DUFF: What's your relationship with the kids in this town, Sheriff?

SHERIFF: You had your chance to ask questions when my lawyer was here.

(Agent Duff turns off the recorder)

DUFF: You hindered an investigation. You will lose your job.

SHERIFF: Agent Duff...I understand why you're coming down like this. And if I were in your shoes, I would do the same. But don't beat yourself up for trusting me. It may not look like it now, but I am one of the good guys.

(Back outside Liz's room, Alex and Liz are watching Alex's slides)

LIZ: I just wish kyle would understand where Max is coming from.

ALEX: Well, you know, I guess some things don't change in a month. LIZ: It's too bad.

ALEX: Ok. this is my host family, the Olsons, and they live in Uppsala which is just north of Stockholm, and that is Johan, Gustav, Rebecka, Mattias, and little Kiki.

LIZ: You know, on the other hand, Kyle has every right to be angry. This is complicated. Sorry.

ALEX: No problem.

LIZ: Ok. Spill.

ALEX: That's Leanna. Me and her have a long distance thing going. Hey, speaking of which, what is up with you and Sean de Luca?

LIZ: That's gross!

ALEX: No, come on. Don't lie to me, all right? I saw the two of you, and there was a twinkle.

LIZ: No. No, I can assure you there's absolutely no twinkle. And what about you? That was pretty smooth playing it cool with Isabel last night. I think her interest was piqued.

ALEX: Well, you know what? Isabel is great, but lusting after her is something the old Alex Whitman would do. The new Alex Whitman snowboarded on that very mountain...almost broke his wrist.

LIZ: Do I know you?

ALEX: Uh, well, yeah...yeah, you do. But I know what you mean. Sometimes I look in the mirror and I don't recognize myself.

(Alex advances to the next slide and Liz gasps in awe)

LIZ: Oh, my God.

ALEX: Yeah, the northern lights. I can't describe it. Basically what it is is you're looking up there, and you're actually seeing electrons from the sun colliding with our atmosphere in every color you could possibly imagine. Really makes you realize what a big world is out there. All these...all these possibilities. All these...new experiences. Life. It's all just there...waiting for us. You really gotta travel, Liz. It's the most amazing thing.

LIZ: Yeah. someday.

ALEX: Right. When there's not so much goin' on.

(At school, Max goes up to Kyle)

MAX: Can we talk?

KYLE: No.

MAX: Look...I'm sorry about what's happening.

KYLE: There's gonna be a hearing. They might take away his job.

MAX: Kyle, your dad has some stuff in his office, stuff that Michael found out at that burial site. It's alien. And if that agent starts poking around...

KYLE: You might be exposed? What a shame.

MAX: Your father could be nailed for withholding evidence. It would only make things worse for him.

KYLE: So take care of it.

MAX: I'm already on their radar. This is the safest way to do this. No one will think twice if you walk into that office. Kyle, we need your help.

(We see Liz waiting around in an empty room. Max comes in)

MAX: I got your note. What's wrong?

LIZ: Nothing. No. No, um...that's not true. Umm...I've just been thinking a lot lately, and...have you ever wanted to see Sweden?

MAX: Sweden?

LIZ: I mean or anywhere. Peru, Nigeria, New Zealand...

MAX: Sure. But the closest I'm gonna get right now is the granilith chamber. Why?

LIZ: Watching Alex this week...I just realized that...it's our right to see the world, to live our dreams...

MAX: Liz, that can't happen.

LIZ: Live life. Why?

MAX: Because it doesn't work that way for us. You know that.

LIZ: You and Isabel and Michael and Tess are...you guys are getting cheated on a lot of things, and it's not fair. None of it is.

MAX: Liz, you...should get to see Sweden. We...I...hold you back.

LIZ: No, Max.

MAX: Kyle was right.

LIZ: That's not true.

MAX: Everyone we touch gets hurt in some way or another. 5 years from now, I don't want you to open your eyes and realize that...that you missed out. You're part of the group. You always will be. But you need to be allowed to...to grow.

LIZ: Why can't you come with me?

MAX: Because I can't. But I'll be watching you, Liz Parker. Wherever you go...and I'll be here when you get back.

(Kyle sneaks into his dad's office. He starts searching around and finds a glowing alien crystal hidden inside a tobacco bag. Agent Duff happens to open the door at that moment, startling him)

DUFF: Kyle.

KYLE: Agent Duff.

DUFF: You shouldn't be in here.

KYLE: I know. Uh...my dad's supposed to sign my report card. I gave it to him a week ago. It's due tomorrow.

DUFF: You're sure it's here?

KYLE: Should be. Yeah.

DUFF: What are you really looking for, Kyle?

(Kyle grabs a blank piece of paper in front of him and folds it in half)

KYLE: Here it is right in front of me.

DUFF: Well, let's see how you're doing.

(Kyle hands over the piece of paper. Agent Duff looks it over and hands it back)

DUFF: I didn't like trigonometry either.

(Kyle leaves the office and takes a look at the paper. It does look like a report card. Suddenly, the print starts to fade away. We see Tess waiting for him in the hallway)

KYLE: Oh! What are you doing here?

TESS: I figured you might need a little help.

KYLE: Don't ever use your mind freeze.

TESS: Warp.

KYLE: Whatever! Your creepy powers on me again! All right? Off limits!

TESS: You know, a simple thanks for saving my butt would be quiet sufficient.

KYLE: I mean it.

(Kyle and Tess leave)

(Meanwhile, Sheriff Valenti is sitting outside a room where the city council has met to decide what to do with him)

JUDGE: A town's reputation is made by those entrusted to enforce its laws and maintain order. Sheriff Valenti has shown of late that he can do neither. Therefore, it is the recommendation of the council that he be removed from office, effective immediately. All those in favor?

COUNCIL MEMBERS: Aye.

JUDGE: Opposed?

(No one objects)

JUDGE: So be it.

(Back at the Crashdown)

Tess: Sorry we're late.

Max: What's wrong?

Tess: They fired Sheriff Valenti.

MAX: No.

ISABEL: They can't. They can't just fire a Sheriff.

KYLE: They can if they're the city council. In the past year, my dad and I have been put through an amazing amount of your crap. You and your Martian friends move in, take over, and obliterate any shred of normalcy. Our lives are no longer ours. Promise me you're gonna stay away from my family. Promise me this is the last time we have to put ourselves on the line for you.

MAX: I can't.

(Kyle extends his hand, offering Max the bag with the alien substance inside. Max reaches out for it, but Kyle drops it on the ground and starts walking away)

(Back in Max's room, Michael is wondering how they can figure out what the alien substance is. Max and Isabel both look glum)

MICHAEL: So how do we figure out what this is? Hey, paging the Evans.

ISABEL: What's Valenti gonna do? You know, it's not like he can just go and be Sheriff somewhere else.

MAX: He gave up everything for us.

MICHAEL: He gave up a crappy job with low pay and long hours.

MAX: Michael...

MICHAEL: What? We were born into this cause. Valenti chose it. Let what he did be worth something.

MAX: I think I have an old microscope in the closet. We know what our cells look like. If this stuff isn't from here and it's from out there, there should be similarities.

(Max sets up the microscope, gets a small sample of the substance from Michael, and then looks at it under the microscope)

MAX: I don't believe this.

MICHAEL: What?

MAX: It looks like they're pulsating.

(It's the next morning. Sheriff Valenti is sleeping in bed. Someone starts knocking at his door. He grumbles and goes to answer the door)

SHERIFF: Ohh...I told you before, Ethel, I don't want any of your damn pamphlets. Ouch!

(Sheriff Valenti opens the door to find Amy de Luca. She has a picnic basket with her)

SHERIFF: Amy!

AMY: Cahoun Park has a power boat with our names all over it.

SHERIFF: In january.

AMY: No lines!

SHERIFF: Listen, I, uh...I appreciate the invite, Amy. I'm just kinda busy today, so...

AMY: Oh! Doin' what?

SHERIFF: Gutters. I'm cleaning the gutters.

AMY: Really? Well, I'll help you out with that, then.

SHERIFF: Oh, thanks...ha. But...it's all right.

AMY: Oh, cut it out, Jim. Let me be your friend. I have a killer potato salad in here, and it's not supposed to rain til the weekend.

(At the Crashdown, Liz delivers a plate of food to Sean)

SEAN: You look like road kill.

LIZ: You know, for your information, Sean, I had and I'm still having a really horrible day.

SEAN: You wanna sit?

LIZ: No. Thank you.

SEAN: You need to write what's bothering you in mustard.

LIZ: Excuse me?

SEAN: Sit, sit, sit. Ahem. It's my aunt Amy's trick. You squirt it right there on that beautiful ground beef patty, chow down...problem's gone.

LIZ: Don't tell me you did this in juvie.

SEAN: It was harder. They had mustard packets. Here. Go ahead. I won't look.

(Liz grabs the mustard bottle and writes out "grow" on the hamburger and then takes a bite)

SEAN: Better?

LIZ: Mmm-hmm...a little bit.

(We see Amy and Jim sitting in a car)

SHERIFF: Thanks for adopting me as your charity case today.

AMY: Oh, don't you dare do that. This had nothing to do with charity.

SHERIFF: Yeah, sure.

AMY: I came to your house today, because I wanted to spend my day with a really good man...and a really good kisser.

(They kiss)

(Switch to the Valenti home. Kyle is looking around for something in the kitchen)

TESS: There's meat loaf in the bottom drawer.

KYLE: I found it.

TESS: My stuff's packed. I'll be gone after school.

KYLE: What?

TESS: Last night, when you said we'd moved in and taken over your life, I realized you were talking about me. I'm sorry I overstayed my welcome.

KYLE: Tess, don't leave.

TESS: It's ok, you know? You have the right to protect your family.

KYLE: You're part of the family I was trying to protect. As far as I can see, you're the only good thing about having an alien in my life.

TESS: Kyle?

KYLE: What?

TESS: You're definitely my favorite human.

KYLE: Yeah, well...you're my favorite Martian.

(Switch to the Pinecrest Psychiatric Hospital. Michael and Isabel are snooping around, trying to find out any information on Laurie Dupree. Michael blasts a window open)

ISABEL: You know, you could have just used your foot.

MICHAEL: I could have.

ISABEL: Can you imagine being locked up in a place like this?

MICHAEL: This would suck big.

ISABEL: Ok...this just doesn't feel right, digging through the intimate details of these people's lives.

(Michael finds a file for Dupree)

MICHAEL: Yes!

(He opens it and it's empty)

MICHAEL: No.

(Isabel searches through some bags)

ISABEL: Michael. They're full of personal belongings. Look, here...look at this. My God. That looks just like you!

MICHAEL: It is me.

(Episode ends as the camera focuses in on an old picture of someone who looks exactly like Michael)